In every piece I write here I try to incorporate the theme of thinking about the business outside IT. A huge part of being more connected to and recognized by the rest of the organization is the words IT managers use. The best CIOs are bilingual. They speak both technology and business, flawlessly, with no accent.

Today I had a discussion with a friend -- who is going through a contentious divorce (is there any other kind?) -- about how the language you use in emotional situations can impact the course of everyone's behavior. Spewing expletives does not lead to understanding -- even if it makes you feel better for the moment -- nor does it allow you to feel long-term satisfaction from your actions or get your hoped for result. Likewise, having expectations that people involved in a situation will act in a particular way does not lead to those same people fulfilling your plans. It takes all parties in an engagement, agreeing upon the desired outcome and timeframe, to provide the seeds for success.