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It's OK to Enjoy Your Team
Written by Margaret Meloni
I was sitting with a client the other day, when he made the following comment: “I really like going to lunch with my team and they invite me all the time, but I think I should only go when I have some type of work related information to share with them.” This was not the primary reason for our work together, but once we completed our initial agenda, I asked if we could circle back to his comment. He agreed and we discussed some interesting points. He enjoys having lunch with his team. He thinks because he is their leader he can only see them when he has business to discuss with them. They invite him on a regular basis. It would appear that they invite him whether they think he has information for them or not. He is fortunate that he is in the position of having a team who wants to spend time with him. And making him even more fortunate, he enjoys them and likes to spend time with them too. So what is the issue? He has a belief that is getting in the way. His belief that he had to bring business information to the team in order to spend time with them was stopping him from doing something he enjoyed. Once he walked through the scenario out loud with me, he saw that he was preventing himself from enjoying time with his team. He realized that when they invited him to lunch, they really wanted him to go to lunch and he really wanted to go with them. So next time they ask him to lunch, he is going to lunch.


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1. 06-12-2008 14:13
 
I have worked in several situations where the leaders only went to lunch with each other except for group events. They put themselves above the team members rather than engaging and getting to know them. Since that was their modus operandi, the team members didn't reciprocate by inviting the leaders either. There was a palpable tension in the group. Having been both follower and leader, I much prefer to engage with the other. Knowing others and helping them to grow makes working together more fun and rewarding.
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